An old friend of mine just lost her mother to that damming thing, cancer. I'm not in her circle anymore so I didn't know about it, but it hit me hard anyway. The thing is I can't imagine losing a parent. We're all too young for that, right? I know Abby is. She's younger than me. Like I said, we're not in the same social circle anymore, but I feel like I know her pretty well. I know she knows me. All I have to do is look at the pictures she took of me all those years ago. The first time she photographed me was when I was her teacher (!) at what is now Bethel University. Those were INTERESTING months, to say the least. I arrived there about as confused and lonely as I had ever been, and left feeling like I had awakened. Somewhere in between is when Abby took my picture. I saw a resemblance in the first picture to one taken of Audrey Hepburn. How did she know I like Audrey Hepburn so much?
The second picture was taken in the spring, shortly before I left Bethel. I'm lying down in the grass, surrounded by books about spiritual things and I look....serene. I was absorbing the word of God like I was a sponge that had never even been wrung out. Getting heavy and happy, floating.
I did three more photo "shoots" with Abby, all of them beautiful and unique and when I needed them the most. Once when I needed to feel beautiful, once when I really really already did, and once when I was marrying the love of my life, Bradley. We ran and kissed and held hands all over the campus of the University of Memphis, and Abby saw it all. I say all this because I'm hurting for my friend, and I'm not there, and this is what I can do. I can pay tribute to the daughter of a woman who was special, who raised a special woman. I met her once when I stayed the night at Abby's house. She was watching a movie with Abby's dad, her husband. I could tell they really loved each other and liked to hang out with each other. They were a hanging out together kind of family. She seemed younger than she was, I think. She looked....whimsical.
I just finished Gilmore Girls, just like about 75% of my female friends, so I guess mother/daugher relationships are fresh on my mind. My own 18 month old daughter is currently trying to turn on the dishwasher and steal stamps from the table. I am thinking of McKenzie, and my time spent in the town McKenzie, with Abby (who has a sister named Mackenzie(did I spell it right?)) When my grandmother died, the thought occurred to me that some of how I live my life as a woman is because of every woman in my maternal line. She influenced my mom, who influenced me, and now I influence McKenzie Ruth Shelander. So I hurt especially for my friend, losing her mama, her teacher. Her friend.
Abby, I hope you got to say goodbye the way you wanted. And if not, I know you'll get to say hello again someday. Just hang on til then, Hang out with us. And keep taking pictures, because you can see us so very well.
No comments:
Post a Comment